i seriously always hated old people before i took this job

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i’m at work right now & i just overheard the following charming conversation between one of my favorite clients (a wingnutty 78-year-old black woman with an enormous blonde bouffant) and an equally old guy who drove her here today, who can only be described as a “chap”. he’s even wearing one of those hats, what the hell is it called, that newsies wore in the victorian era.

chap: you’re drinking coffee? this late in the day??!?

wingnutty woman: ‘course i am! i’ll drink coffee any old time i can get it!

chap: why is that?

wingnutty woman: [indignantly] i’m a sleepyhead! that’s why!

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