& burn burn burn like roman candles


when we were pulling into pittsburgh at 6 a.m. yesterday, my greyhound driver got on the loudspeaker and announced, “i want to wish you all a happy new year. and i hope that 2009 is the best year you’ve ever had, but not the best year you ever will have.” he sounded sincere and urgent. i don’t think i’ve ever heard such a genuinely nice new year’s wish. who would have guessed it would be on the hound at 6 a.m.?

new york was good, full of inspiring ladies & good people who i miss. i remain glad to be just a visitor, though. riding the LIRR back into the city on saturday night i felt the genuine misery, of all those people trapped in gilded cages miserably shuffling to work at some god-awful hour. that used to be me, and i am glad that it is not me any longer.

today is gorgeous & i can’t really enjoy it cuz i’m here. it’s okay, though, i guess. the building across the street blocks my view of the sky entirely, but one of its windows reflects it. i can see the most eye-blinding shade of blue & a bare spidery tree & all sorts of birds swirling around. i wouldn’t even know they were there were it not for this window, this little portal to the other world. to the casual observer, i am just staring vapidly into space. but you know what? the casual observer’s wrong.

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