lately i’ve been kinda overwhelmed with speaking, or writing, or communicating, because everything i want to say i feel like i can’t talk about. it’s too personal, or too up-in-the-air and i don’t want to jinx it, or i don’t know how i feel, or it’s talking uneccesary shit, or whatever. i have been writing about the past a lot lately. i swore i wasn’t gonna do another zine until my book is done but i’ve already started working on another one, inspired by my decade-in-review post. writing an essay about each year out of the past ten. i only get inspired to write after midnight and then come into the office bleary. it’s been awhile. i’ve been a responsible bed-goer during the weeknights for quite some time now, no longer up all night writing or doin’ it. waking up at 8:45 to go to work refreshed. fuck it. who needs that sort of thing.
my sister was in pittsburgh this weekend & that was fun. we mostly just hung out casually, which is nice. i had something larger & more meaningful to say about it but i forgot. the snow is all gone & it feels like it never happened, like those fourteen consecutive days of snow were all some sort of mistake. it was our entire reality just last week & now it’s gone. feeling mild like springtime even though spring is a long way off, even though spring as we knew it will probably never happen again.